Recently some construction workers who were demolishing the old neighborhood munitions plant stumbled upon some leftover product. Curious about the watermelon-sized canister, they pulled it out of the rubble to get a better look at it and noticed the word “warhead” stamped on the end.

It was time to call the bomb squad, although in doing so they missed an opportunity to finish up their job in record time. Military-grade ordnance can do in seconds what takes days with wrecking balls and earthmovers.

While authorities formulated a game plan, police babysat the bomb at the plant. This was good because the last thing you want is to have some local hoods jumping the fence and swiping it.

A few days later they roll it into a convenience store at one in the morning and demand to have the cash register opened.

“Hand over all the money. I’m not afraid to use this,” they shout.

“All we have is fifty dollars in change,” the clerk responds.

“OK, hand over all the money and a carton of smokes,” they say, effectively doubling their loot.

Then they roll the bomb out of the store and drive off. They light up to celebrate, and crime solves itself a few minutes later when they snuff out one of the stolen cigarettes on the warhead. It goes off leaving only a huge crater and smoldering roll of pennies.

As it turned out, the warhead was just a casing. It was never packed with explosives.

Advertisements